It’s a Dog’s Life . . .
DOG: [Jumps on me.] Gimme a treat
ME: No.
DOG: [Wants Out. Wants in. Wants Out. Wants in. Wants Out. Wants in.]
ME: [Lets Dog Out. Lets Dog in. Lets Dog Out. Lets Dog in. Lets Dog Out. Lets Dog in.]
DOG: [Brings toy.] Play with me.
ME: [Plays with dog for a bit.]
DOG: [Drops toy. Brings other toy.] Play with me.
ME: [Plays with dog for a bit.]
DOG: [Drops toy. Brings yet another toy] Play with me.
ME: [Plays with dog for a bit.]
DOG: [Grabs remote and runs to another room.]
ME: [Follows dog and takes remote away.] No. No sir. You don’t chew on the remote.
DOG: [Starts chewing coffee table leg]
ME: [Pushes dog away.] No. No sir. You don’t chew on the furniture.
DOG: [Starts chewing on sofa leg.]
ME: [Pushes dog away.] No. No sir. What did I say about chewing on furniture?
DOG: [Jumps on my lap. Starts licking my face.]
ME: Stop it. [Moves dog away from face.]
DOG: [Nibbles on my hand.]
ME: [Moves hand.] Stop. [Puts dog on floor at my feet.
DOG: [Nibbles feet.]
ME: Ya basta! Enough. I’m at my wit’s end with you.
DOG: Humph. [Lays head on my foot. Closes eyes. Starts to snore.]
ME: [Looks down at Dog. Heart swells. Mumbles . . . ] What have I done?
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